Christmas Tips for SINGLES with Step Families
It’s easy to feel overwhelmed during the holiday season, especially if you are a single parent or involved with someone who has kids like yourself! Christmas Day itself can challenge our patience and acceptance for our crazy relatives. For stepfamilies the craziness can be doubled, with two sets of parents, step-siblings, half-siblings, all the grandparents, visiting family and friends, as well as an assortment of views on the holiday can be the perfect blend for a stepfamily holiday disaster.
Stepfamilies deal with a number of holiday factors that traditional families never do. For example, who gets to have the children on Christmas Eve or Christmas Day, or which family is going to buy the big gift and which house will it reside? Each family has its traditions, customs and expectations of Christmas.
Consider these steps to avoid additional stress this holiday season:
- Have realistic expectations and try to be flexible with day to day schedules. Children of single parents want to have fun and relax on their holiday vacation - don’t set up too much for them or they won’t enjoy themselves.
- Be willing to compromise and have a contingency plan in case things go wrong. If a dinner runs late or traffic is horrific, have a back up arrangement that won’t cause unnecessary stress?
- Don’t forget to introduce your date and his or her kids to the entire family when you enter the holiday gathering.
- Write things down. It doesn’t do any good to have a schedule if no one remembers it. The children need to be informed - so jot down the holiday schedule on the fridge the week prior to the holiday.
- Don’t go overboard on gift-giving. Some single parents may feel guilty and try to compensate by burying their kids more then they need. Others may find themselves competing to provide the best gift. It’s not what you get for the holiday, it’s who is around you that counts the most!
- Create new traditions with your single friend and their kids.
- Don’t expect perfection. No family is completely immune from holiday conflicts, divided loyalties and competition. This holds just as true for traditional families as it does for step families.
Enjoy the holidays the best you can - they only come once a year!
